DP2012

Listen up, vultures, it’s time to get your dead pool picks in. You know the drill – 10 ponies per person, emailed to me asap.

I admit I dropped the ball on this one and failed to get the call for entries out before NY eve, but let me remind you that rule 6 is in effect so watch yourselves. The deadline for entries is now 31 January.

Here’s hoping for a bumper crop this year!

• Updates
• Rules
• Scoreboard

Updates:

January 2nd: Call for entries.

January 21st: Hit! Etta James bows out at 73, getting Hayden off the mark with (27 minus 50% leukemia discount) 14 points. Nice work Cookie!

February 12th: Houston, we have a problem! Whitney beats Bobby Brown to death at 48, handing Michelle the lead with 52 points.

May 21st: Robin Gibb is no longer stayin’ alive, thanks to some Saturday Night Cancer. 38 points sees Hoppy back in black on 38 points, and Hayden tied for the lead on 52. Nice.

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How to play:

1. Pick 10 celebs you think will kick the bucket during the next year.
2. Send them to me (the names, not the celebs themselves – with the possible exception of Pauley Perrete. If you have Pauley Perrete, let me know and I will break my ‘keep those crazy bastards away from me’ rule and send you my home address). All other entries must be delivered to me via email. If you can’t figure out how to get an email to me, please stop right now. You are too stupid to take part in my beloved dead pool.
3. When some lucky punter’s pony ‘shuffles off their mortal coil’, they receive (100- the pony’s age) points.

Rules:

1. Ten ponies per player. Period.
2. Any entries received after 31 January 2012 must be unique. Get original or get lost.
3. Ponies must be alive at 0001hrs CST on Jan 1, 2012. If your pony plowed into a tree on their way to new year’s party, stiff shit.
4. Ponies must be famous or infamous: Dana Reeve wasn’t, Maddox Jolie isn’t
5. The pony has to be declared dead to score. Brain death isn’t enough… someone has to pull the plug.
6. Anyone who gives me crap for posting the picks late this year loses all their points
7. Two categories: Most hits and Most points
8. No prizes shall be awarded, but all will acknowledge the winner to be the “Most Cynical Bastard”, who may use the initials “MCB” after their name in perpetuity
9. Scoring ends 2359hrs CST Dec 31, 2012
10. The ultimate source of truth is the Dead People Server
11. If you decide to *ahem* take matters into your own hands, the points DO count. However, I can’t promise not to squeal when the cops come a-knocking. I’m too young and pretty to go to prison. Maybe one of those white-collar-conjugal-visit prisons, but certainly not a blue-collar-pound-me-in-the-ass prison. No way, no how.
12. Any pony known to have a terminal illness at the time picks are received, may, at the discretion of the almighty lawmaker (Stu), have a 50% terminal penalty applied if/when said pony expires. I AM THE LAW!

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SCOREBOARD

Stu(0) Imran Khan Courtney Love Jack Osbourne Gary Busey Fidel Castro Keith Richards Scott Dixon Margaret Thatcher Martin Landau Bear Grylls Johnny (0) Michael Hill Jeweller Lady Gaga Prince Phillip Barack Obama Miley Cyrus Demi Moore Lindsay Lohan Ringo Starr Paul McCartney George Michael Bruce (0) SACHA BARON COHEN JOHN LITHGOW NIKKI BLONSKY ROD STEWART DEMI LOVATO DANNY BONADUCE DAVID DUCHOVNY PETER O’TOOLE LINDA HAMILTON JAMES MARSDEN Paul (0) Steven Hawking Queen Elizabeth II Imran Khan Hamid Karzai Fidel Castro Robert Redford Iggy Pop Prince Phillip Kylie Minogue Colin Meads Philippa (0) Robbie Coltrane Chris Jenner Gary Busey Tom Cruise Bruce Forsyth Cliff Richard Brett Michaels Dennis Rodman Meat Loaf(M L Aday) Giuliana Rancic Foreman (0) Charlie Sheen Lindsay Lohan Michael Douglas 50 Cent Keira Knightly Stephen Hawking Kayne West Ringo Starr Mohammad Ali Boy George Nick (0) Margaret Thatcher Kylie Minogue Hugo Chavez Prince Harry Nelson Mandela Rupert Murdoch Stephen Hawkins Lyndsay Lohan Michael J Fox Justin Beiber Chris (0) Stephen Hawking Snoop Dogg Casey Anthony Willie Nelson Nick Cannon Charlie Sheen Russell Brand Justin Bieber OJ Simpson Pat Sajak Ben (38) Sinead O’Connor Stephen Hawking Miley Cyrus Michael Douglas Randy Quaid Nicole Polizzi Carl Pilkington Josef Fritzl Saif Gaddafi Robin Gibb

Dave(0) Paula Abdul Robert Downey Jr Lindsay Lohan Russell Brand Jimmy Carter Bear Grylls Johnny Knoxville Keith Richards Neil Diamond Hugh Hefner Simonne (0) Bill Nighy Liza Minelli Pete Doherty Ronnie Wood George Michael Val Kilmer Seann William Scott Steve-O Betty White William Shatner Mike (0) Demi Moore Joaquin Phoenix Prince Philip Justin Beiber Jonah Lomu Maggie Thatcher Steven Adler Michael Douglas Hamed Karzai Hugh Hefner Wendy (0) The Queen Jon Bon Jovi Sean Connery David Bowie Dolly Parton Elizabeth Taylor Sugar Ray Robinson Nina Simone Yoko Ono Willie Nelson Sam (0) Ashton Kutcher Prince Philip Dame Margaret Thatcher Snoop Dogg Kirk Douglas Peter Leitch – The Mad Butcher Kris Kardashian Lewis Hamilton Johnny Knoxville Ozzy Osbourne Michelle (52) Whitney Houston Hugh Hefner Demi Moore Russell Brand Sharon Osbourne Arnold Schwarzenegger Jon Bon Jovi Woody Allen Meryl Streep Johnny Knoxville Hayden (52) Etta James Tara Reid Prince Phillip Hosni Mubarak Randy Quaid Michael Douglas Robin Gibb Roger Ebert Margaret Thatcher Molly Meldrum Rich (0) Boy George Lady Gaga Heather Locklear Kirsten Dunst Hugh Hefner Hamid Karzai Stephen Hawking John Frusciante George Michael Courtney Love

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