If you don’t swing, don’t ring

Did you know that the original Playboy mansion was in Chicago? I sure as hell didn’t, else I wouldn’t have left it till the penultimate day of my second trip here before checking it out. Turns out I’ve actually walked by it countless times, as it’s just around the corner from Dave’s apartment and on our way to the pub. Alas, the last of the bunnies left in the early 80’s when Hef moved full-time to LA. Ground zero of Chicago hedonism is now here (and here).

Apparently there used to be a brass plate on the door with the Latin inscription, Si Non Oscillas, Noli Tintinnare (“If you don’t swing, don’t ring”). I’m pretty sure they weren’t talking about golf.

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2 Responses to “If you don’t swing, don’t ring”


  1. 1 John September 23, 2011 at 5:46 am

    The story of the brass plated Latin inscription is true. And, to that end, I wonder “if those walls could talk,” what we might hear!

  2. 2 Mark T. Jordan June 13, 2016 at 4:17 pm

    Andre Baruch, the radio voice of the Brooklyn Dodgers and the Shadow in the ’50s and his wife Bea Wayne, a big-band singer, had a similar plaque on their front door – but it turned the emphasis from ‘if YOU don’t swing’ to ‘if IT don’t swing…’ (don’t ring) by translating the Latin thus: “Si non Convivere, Noli Tintere.” The idea of conviviality (“convivere”) rather than oscillating (“oscillas”), which is as close to the concept as the Romans could get.


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